8. Double Standards

This pattern refers to the mentality and behavior of making inconsistent or even completely different judgments towards two things of the same nature. 

Examples are: 

• When I am late and make others wait, it is usually because of traffic. When others are late and make me wait, it is their lack of respect and carelessness, which is annoying and makes no sense. 
• When I don’t reply to people’s messages soon enough, it is because I am very busy and then I forget. When others don’t reply to my messages soon enough, I think it is intentional and rude. 
• When my child runs around in the shop and bumps into people, it is because he is very active and full of energy. When someone else’s child bumps into me, that child is not well disciplined. 
• If I shout and tell you off, it is because you have shouted at me first and I want you to know it is not right.

Related patterns include: Avoiding and Hiding, Exaggerating and Debasing, Making Unnecessary Comparisons, Self-Centeredness, Driven Solely by Self-Interest, Fixed Expectations, Shirking and Shifting Responsibility, Resentment and Revenge and Responding with Negative Emotions. 

This pattern makes it difficult to truly know ourselves and our problems. When this pattern is active, we are unable to remain fair and reasonable towards ourselves and others. It can become a source of misunderstanding and conflict and cause all sorts of problems in life.

• Cultivate Wu Xin and treat everyone, including oneself, with Wu Xin without discrimination. 
• You and those who share the same interest as you are actually not above other people or entitled to special privilege or status. What is truly special is the mission and responsibility we have towards ourselves and the world. 
• One of the fundamental qualities of the universe and the True Self is non-discriminatory unification and totality. Treating everything equally and without discrimination is a way to return to and embrace the True Self and the source of nature.